So there I was; I'd just barely managed to navigate the labyrinthine dark alleyways that make up the, shall we say, less savory parts of Aylor, and had finally arrived at the doors of the famous Snooky's Pub. I've been hearing a lot about this pub lately. It seems that old Snooky has made a bit of a revival.

Two months ago my fondest memories of the place involved being buried to my knees in garbage and filth, defending a half-empty bottle of SparklemintFresh(tm) mouthwash from a family of starving rats. And now...well...I see that the rats are still here. So it's not much to look at, but the feel is somehow much warmer.

I'd made arrangements earlier in the week to meet up with Snooky, the proprietor of Snooky's Pub, to find out more about his bar, his plans, and to see what all the public confusion is about. 

Snooky's Pub
  You find yourself in a dank room.  It appears to have once been an actual
pub, but has long since been abandoned.  The only drinking that goes on in
this place is from a paper bag.  Ever since the arena was built, business
has been sour for old Snooky.  He was sure that business would actually pick
up, but it seems that people interested in blood and gore have no use for
alcohol.  So now it's Snooky that's picked up.  Snooky's pub is abandoned
and filled with litter. 

[ Exits: (east) south ]
(C) A tough looking bodyguard stands here looking for a fight.
Snooky The Master of the Pub is here.
A very disreputable looking drunk man lounges around the old pub.

Snooky exclaims 'Welcome!'

You say 'I like what you've done with the place'

Right here you see:
     - (C) The bodyguard
     - Snooky
     - A disreputable drunk
You see a door to the east.
South from here you see:
     - A nasty rodent
     - A nasty rodent
     - A nasty rodent

You close the door.

Snooky says 'Wow, thanks for closing the door.'

You say 'Gotta keep out the riffraff'

Snooky says 'Yes, our only security here is our deceivingly strong drunk'

A disreputable drunk exclaims, "*Hic!* I'm...just waitin' fer 'ol Snook to come back. I'm *Hic!* almost outta al-c--alco *Hic!* hol!"

Snooky says 'He's tougher than he looks'

You ask 'So tell me, and don't get me wrong, I'm a fan, it seems like you're investing a good amount in this pub business. What's it for?'

Snooky says 'I want a fun place for people all all races and types to have fun and drink and gamble in a public forum. Ever since the fall of Midgaard, Aylor is without a good place to hang out and really meet other people. I also provide work which can provide income for lower level players.'

You ask 'Oh yeah? What kind of work are you offering? Say an aspiring adventurer fresh out of the academy drops by, green, wet behind the ears, probably literally born yesterday. What do you give her to do?'

Snooky says 'We are currently hiring "pub stockers" for all shifts...we pay 500k a week plus bonuses.'

You ask 'Wow 500k a week for a tenderfoot newbie. That kind of pay sounds pretty great, actually... So what's a pub stocker?'

Snooky says 'Well before today I had two dedicated stockers come and drop beer and food Items imported from New Thalos and the Land of the Beer Goblins.'

Snooky says 'But with the increase of saccers, we are going to have to increase staff and decrease item drops. Taking a more personal approach to beverage service.'

Starling opens the door from the other side.

Starling drops 6 * a pile of non-regulation dog poo.

Snooky exclaims 'EY!'
Snooky says 'Thats Starling, one of the saccers'

You say 'I see.'
You get 6 * a pile of non-regulation dog poo.
You say 'This is very unsanitary.'

Auction: Fiendish is auctioning a pile of non-regulation dog poo (Level 1, Num 145). Current bid is 100.

Snooky says 'Yeah, we are working on getting a manor space and turning it into Snooky's Club, a swinging nightclub scene where there is a cover charge and saccers won't be welcome'

You say 'Sounds exciting. But tell me something. This place is a bit...and I'll be gentle about it...run down. If you know what I mean.'

Auction: Fiendish is auctioning a pile of non-regulation dog poo (Level 1, Num 148). Current bid is 100.

You ask 'What do you plan to do to fix up the atmosphere?'

Snooky says 'This all got started while I was in Imm Jail and I met Claptrap, my business partner. Clap is an experienced builder and is working on getting his cred high enough to make Snooky's bar...in a different location of course. Lasher said that this place is condemned and will remain as is until it is destroyed. For now this is all I have to work with. The mess is the result of the Arena south of here and the saccers and looters...I think they are just jealous really.'

You say 'Haters love to hate. Also hatters love to hat, but that is perhaps unrelated. You mentioned a partner; How did you two meet again?'

Snooky says 'Yes Claptrap, my business partner. We met in Imm Jail about a month ago, during your paper's first entry on my pub. I was only able to communicate through personal notes at the time, but my staff did a fine job stocking the pub in my absence.'

You say 'That sounds a bit like an adventure. You were both in there together?'

Snooky says 'Yeah I was in there for a little over a week, and he was there with me for a day or two before they realised we were sharing a cell and we were separated.'

You exclaim 'A week! Cruel and unusual! Don't tell anyone, but I was jailed once for something I didn't even do.'

Snooky snickers with you about your shared secret.

You say 'Come to think of it...it might have been more than once. But I probably deserved one of those...'

Snooky chuckles 'Yeah I didnt do it either :)'
Snooky leans on the bar and it breaks into pieces and We are currently hiring "pub stockers" for all shifts...we pay 500k a week plus bonuses.he almost loses his balance.
Snooky says 'But things have picked up here recently. If I could just find some tables, the saccer moms wouldn't be such a bother:P'

You say 'I think "mom" is only ironic in Starling's case. That's pretty cool though, finding a partner after crime.'

Snooky smirks 'He made a webpage for us as well, check out my finger page:P'

You say 'I did! It's pretty neat! Do you have plans for advertising your stocker positions? I suggest the general board. Most newbies don't read forsale. Or even direct tells!'

Snooky says 'I plan to post on the general board as needed, we had an application process on the site but we took it down.'

You ask 'Why take it down?'

Snooky sulks 'Most of the applications were spam :( We have a lot of haters who don't like the idea of low level players having relevance in Aylor not based around questing and clans. Also the fact that we sell tp tokens for 500k...causing alot of stir among the t9 types.'

You say 'Selling TP tokens for 500k?! That seems like a loss, though.'

Snooky says 'It will be at first, but I'm hoping to change what a tp is worth over time back to the old days. How it works is you invest 5 million in gold to me, and then I sell TP tokens to you for 500k...FOR LIFE. This is called the Snooky's Plat-Num Membership...the list is very small right now, but it'll grow. Saccers and griefers are disqualified from this service forever, of course. We have zero tolerance for the saccer moms.'

You say 'Still, it sounds quite generous... You know, I might be willing to participate.'

Gold on hand      :      3,192,810
Gold in the bank  :     28,733,133
                    --------------
Net Worth         :     31,925,943

Snooky smirks 'Well I'll let you know first when we are accepting new members, It's very hard to meet the demand:P'
Snooky says 'We have a Black Diamond Membership as well... 30 million gets you free TP tokens for life...when we have them in stock and it gets you first pick over the Plat-Num members'

You say 'Well that's awesome, and I see we've acquired a bit of a crowd in here. Word must be getting around.'

Snooky smirks 'We had a wedding reception here just a few days ago:P'
Snooky says 'I forgot their names, I only was able to make a brief appearance...but we had about 9 people in the pub (just 81 short of capacity by building code standards!)'

Cambodia opens the door from the other side.
Cambodia closes the door.

Snooky exclaims 'Ahh here is one of my customers!'
Snooky says 'Cambodia is a regular here and a stand-up guy as well.'

Ixle opens the door from the other side.
Ixle gallantly tips his hat.

Snooky closes the door.

Ixle says 'I thought your pub was just some figment of your imagination at first.'

You say 'All pubs were at some point a figment of someone's imagination.'

Snooky smirks 'Fiendish here is with the Midgaardian Publishing Group...you might be in the paper Ixle:P'

Ol' Dirty Fiendish polishes his press pass.

Ixle says 'Good, hearing Fiendish mention my name really turns me on.'

You say 'You know, I get that a lot.'

The spavined storyteller opens the door.
An old man wanders into the bar and leans against the bar.
Snooky closes the door.

You exclaim 'Nice! The spavined storyteller stops here! This guy is awesome! With his stories! And his telling! And his...uhh...spavin!'

The spavined storyteller says, "Come!  I will tell you a story."
The spavined storyteller says 'There have been earthquakes lately.'
The spavined storyteller says 'Some ships attempting to explore the unknown oceans have been lost.'
The spavined storyteller says 'Perhaps they will return with word of new land birthed by the sea.'

The bodyguard exclaims 'Old man you better cool it with that earthquake crap or you're outta here!'

You say 'I will definitely recommend this place to all of my friends.'

Snooky says 'Yeah it's really coming together'

Snooky smirks 'One of my Plat-Num members is on his way here, to roll the dice with 'Ol Snooky:P Once a guy named Randy won 3mil with one dice roll'

You say 'I know a guy named Randy. He draws webcomics. Probably no relation, though.'

Snooky says 'I think his name is actually RanDalathor or something like that. I call him Randy though.'

Teengohan opens the door from the other side.

Snooky exclaims 'Ah Gohan, my first Plat-Num member! Tell the reporter here, how is our service?'

Ol' Dirty Fiendish licks the tip of his laptop and prepares to write.

Teengohan says 'Ah, what's up? On a scale between 1 to 10 I would say 10'

You ask 'So how often do you come here? Is this a once in a while thing? An after school special? A home away from the loving wife and kids? If you know what I mean.'

Teengohan chuckles 'As a customer I like to hang out here. But as a member it makes it 7 times more fun :)'

Snooky smirks 'Gohan knows alot about rolling 7s when we play dice:P'
Snooky asks 'Once Drerius gets here you want to roll the bones a few times with us Fiendish?'

You say 'I am not a gambling man. But if your stocks are kept up, I could spring for a round.'

...* Snooky runs off and comes back with provisions * ...

You sit on a wood and canvas camp stool.
You get a Bottle of Brewington Special.
You drink some schnapps from a Bottle of Brewington Special.
You drink some schnapps from a Bottle of Brewington Special.
You are drunk.
You exclaim 'Drink up everyone!'
You spill schnapps all over yourself trying to reach your mouth.
 

You pass out.

You wake up in a pool of your own waste hours later.
 

You groan.

CLAN: After a hard day of work, Fiendish staggers out the door, and heads home from the nearest pub.