10. Article Requested: Ba'al is full of bots! Please expose them!
    Why we didn't bother: Bots can't read, nor do they have interesting fleshy parts worth exposing.

9. Article Requested: Don't Drink the Water! What's in that fountain anyway?
    Why we didn't bother: We're still (hic) draining our pool o' margarita.

8. Article Requested: TP Inflation! Player demands cost-of-adventuring TP raise!
    Why we didn't bother: Gaardian will publish the article of your choice for 24  29TP.

7. Article Requested: Madam's Manor? Who's running brothels in their real estate?
    Why we didn't bother: Increased exposure may drive up the price of goods.

6. Article Requested: Amazon near liquidation?!?
    Why we didn't bother: As modern as our society may be, it's still not polite to speak of menses in public forums.

5. Article Requested: Any article will do! Just release a new issue already!
    Why we This is too stupid to address, even for fake news.didn't bother: News doesn't happen until we say it happens. There is no rush, there is only Zuul.

4. Article Requested: GQ Bots Ruin the MUD! And What!?
    Why we didn't bother: GQ bots complete GQ's quickly and efficiently, thereby decreasing wait time between GQ's thus creating more opportunity for a greater number of players to be able to join a GQ in their range. Yeah, right.

3. Article Requested: Founder Booted! Rogues ousts Mars
    Why we didn't bother: This is too stupid to address, even for fake news.

2. Article Requested: Rich getting richer! New bank max increases wealth, power divide
    Why we didn't bother: Well, it's not because we were paid off to ignore this matter. REALLY.

1. Article Requested: Grammar Rage, Indeed! Punctuation Patrol abuse and excessive force!
    Why we didn't bother: Hey, I like my kneecaps. Both of them. Right where they are, in one piece each.