A mysterious death was reported to the Cityguard at 4.35 am today. Due to the early morning, nobody actually saw the death, but people sleeping off their drunken binge in the nearby park heard someone shouting, "I don't want to live anymore!" before a loud explosion occured. The cityguards were called in by the drunks because someone is disturbing their sleep. When the cityguards finally managed to get the story out of them, all they found was a grease stain in the middle of the street.

 

Investigators canvased the streets for witnesses but few people are coming forward. A few were heard muttering "it's best to stay out of this since THE immortal is involved". A vagabond spoke with our reporter "I saw the whole thing. He was screaming lots of stuff but i only heard the 'You suck Lasher!' before a thunderbolt turned him into a grease stain. Man u gotta admire his guts." The vagabond was the next person turned into a grease stain by a lightning bolt from nowhere.

 

As yet, DNA testing of the grease stain still has not revealed the identity of the victim. But the forensic department of the cityguards has revealed that "it has a distinct fishy taste". This reporter refuses to speculate as to how the forensic department knows that.

 

The cityguards are seeking eye-witnesses but after the display of power on the vagabond, few people are willing to step forward. Nonetheless, as fine upright citizens of Aardwolf, Gaardian seeks any eye-witnesses out there for the cityguards and directs them to visit the cityguard headquarters. Please avoid coming to Gaardian. You will be shot on sight.