MENLO PARK, CA—“It was New Year’s Day, 3am, and I was feeling a bit too buzzed to head to bed," Mark Zuckerberg reminisced. "On a whim I decided to log onto a MUD, I think it was called Aardwolf. I tried to make some lewd jokes on the newbie channel but I was quickly redirected to some sort of 'friend talk' channel. That's when it hit me. Friend Talk. Face Book. Boom."

Mark Zuckerberg went on to discuss his later 'visit with the porcelain throne' and '5am trip to 7-11 with some buddies' but did not mention Aardwolf again.