Disturbing reports have been surfacing recently concerning some out-of-the-ordinary incendiary behaviour in the vicinity of Grand Plaza.

 

The Gnomish Incinerator Bot, the iconic centrepiece of the Tinker's Guild, has been linked to several unconfirmed stories of non-consensual flambeying.

 

Mr S. Hrythyn, of 32, the Plaza, had this to say:

 

"They aren't the best neighbours of late. Hard to get any shut-eye, what with the waves of heat and screaming and all."

 

When asked to elaborate on these claims, Mr Hrythyn declined to comment further without a contribution of an additional 3 trains.

 

On the way back to the office, I stumbled into Mistress Marna, the local Lamian adventurer. One tin of Kuwi armor polish, and she was willing to reveal all.

 

"There's a lot of new faces in town of late. A bit green you know, and I don't mean orc-like. All hack and slash first, ask questions later.

 

"Take Ripmeanuwan, an elf who recently arrived from Dortmund. A Stick a fork in me, I'm done.couple of nights back he was staggering back from the Casino. I ran into him in the Plaza, and he was barely in a fit state to walk. He was eyeballing the Incinerator Bot, convinced it was one of the touring dwarves who had cheated him out of some trivia points at a poker game.

 

"Before I could stop him, he had lurched towards the bot, and was banging on it with the hilt of his sword, demanding to be paid what he was owed.

 

"Next thing I knew, a mechanical panel slid up revealing two unfriendly eyes. Then another panel slid down, and there was a large roar as flame shot out. The smell of burnt hamster was just terrible."

 

I caught up with Rip at the Canyon Memorial. His body was covered in bandages and he was incoherent, repeatedly mumbling "Kaiser something" over and over again.

 

Unconfirmed reports indicate a makeshift sign has been erected on the bot, simply saying "CON ME".

 

The Tinkers Guild were contacted, but declined to comment.